


Scars of the Past (AU) (On Hold)

by AwesomeAngelKitten



Series: Scars of the Past [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angry John Winchester, Drunk John Winchester, Emotions, Feelings, M/M, Minor Character Death, Physical Abuse, flash backs
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-01
Updated: 2016-01-01
Packaged: 2018-05-10 20:23:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5599576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwesomeAngelKitten/pseuds/AwesomeAngelKitten
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is part of a 3 part series. This is Part 2 of 3. </p><p>There are Scars from our Past that could tell a story. And this is Dean and Sam's Winchesters's stories of their scars from their past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Scars of the Past (AU) (On Hold)

Dean and Sam were sitting inside of Dean's house. Sam was on the laptop checking if there were any new cases to solve. Dean had a beer in his hand and every few seconds he was checking if Castiel had called him without Sam noticing. Every time he checked it, it said "No Missed Calls". "Any news on any new cases?" asked Dean. "Nope none. Anything from Castiel and where he could have taken off to?" "Nope, hopefully he didn't go too far or get himself stuck." said Dean. "Have you tried calling him to see if he would answer his phone?" asked Sam. "Yes I have." Dean said, as he took out his phone and sent Castiel a text. "Where are you Cas?" Dean sat there for a while and waited for Castiel to replied. Sam closes his laptop and yawns. "I am going out if Castiel shows up let me know." "Yeah sure." said Dean. Sam picks up his laptop and places it into the laptop bag and leaves.

Castiel looked at his phone and noticed that Dean send him a text message. He dials Dean's phone. Dean notices that Castiel is calling him. "Hey Cas where are you?" he asks Castiel. "Hello Dean. I am not too far from your house." Castiel said. "Sam left just a few minutes ago after you called." Dean said. Castiel hung up and appeared a few seconds later in Dean's house. "Cas, you really need to stop doing that." Dean said. "Sorry Dean." "Well next time you do that warn me." Dean said.

Sam started up the Mustang Ford 65 and called Gabriel, "Hey Gabe, I was wondering if I could come over and hangout?" he asked. "Sure Samsquash, but what are you going to tell your brother where you were at?" Gabriel asked. "I will tell him that I am hanging out with Charlie for the weekend." Sam said. "Alright let me know when you get here, so I can unlock the front door." Gabriel said. "Alright I will call Charlie and let her know what to tell my brother if he tries to call me." Sam said. "Alright." said Gabriel as he hung up. Sam removed the phone from his ear, scrolled down for Charlie's number, and called her. "Hello Sam. What's up?" Charlie said as she answered her phone. "Hey Charlie I was wondering if you could do me a favor?" Sam asked. "Yeah sure anything for you." Charlie said. "Can you tell my brother that I am hanging with you for this weekend, so I can get away for the weekend so I can go see my girlfriend?" he asked. "Ohh who's the lucky lady Sam?" Charlie asked. "I will tell you and Dean when I've decided you two can meet her after this weekend. If she feels comfortable enough to meet you two." Sam said. "Awe your no fun Sam." Charlie says as she pouts. "Sorry Charlie. I gotta go before Dean notices I am gone." Sam said as he hung up the phone.

As Sam arrived at Gabriel's house, he pulled out his cell phone and turned it off. So Dean couldn't get a hold of him. He turned off the car and opened the door, as and put a smile on his face. He was glad that he was able to see Gabriel again, its been forever since they had last seen each other. He opened Gabriel's front door and asked "Gabe, I am here. Where are you?" as he walked into the house. Gabriel walked out from the bathroom with a towel on his waist. "Hey Samsquash, I wasn't expecting you here so soon." He said as he was drying off his hair. Sam face went red. "Y-yeah its not that long of drive from where I was at." Sam said as he stutters a little. Gabriel had a smirk on his face, he walked up to Sam. "You so adorable when you blush like that Samsquash." Gabriel said. Sam blushed even more red. "Gabe s-stop messing around." Sam stuttered again. "Oh you enjoying what you see?" Gabriel smirked again. Sam turned his head and stuttered, "J-just get some clothes on so we can talk."

"So where's Sam? I noticed he wasn't here when I appeared here." Castiel asked. Dean shrugged and said, "Only thing he said he was going out. He didn't really say where." "Oh." Castiel said. Dean set the beer on the table. "I am not too worried about him taking off too far. He probably went to grab some lunch for us. Knowing him he will probably be a while. Like he was last week." Dean grin. "Last week you ended up sending him out there by making him look around everywhere. Just to find you a pie that you wanted to be just perfect. Because you wanted alone time with me." Castiel said. "Yeah and? I am not allowed to have alone time with my favorite angel?" asked Dean as he sat on the sofa and got comfortable. Castiel sat by him and nodded. "Of course you can spend time with me, but why exactly are we hiding this relationship from Sam again? I am little worried that Sam might think I am ignoring you both, when I am sneaking around and seeing you without telling Sam I am fine." Castiel said. Dean was a little speechless, Castiel was telling the truth, why was he trying to hide his relationship with Castiel from Sam.

Maybe cause he remembered what dad did to Sam, when Sam brought his first relationship home. The memories were horrible, how their dad had beat it into Sam's head how wrong it was.

Flashback

Sam and Jacob, his boyfriend, were sitting and watching TV while laying on Sam's bed. They were laughing at the show they were watching. Dean was glad that Sam found someone, at least for now. John would be furious if he ever found out that Sam was dating a guy. Dean was sitting on his bed flipping through pages in his car magazine, that their dad gave him for his birthday, while playing "Hey Jude". At least for now Sam and Dean weren't too worried about their dad coming home anytime soon. And of course their dad made Dean responsible for anything that happens to Sam. As the show ended Jacob got up and said, "Maybe we should go ask Dean and see if he could make us some of his hamburgers you talk about?" Sam sat up and smiled, "Yes Dean makes the greatest hamburgers you would totally love them." Jacob smiled as well, very happy he finally gets to try Dean's famous burgers for the first time, especially since Sam kept always talking about them. He couldn't wait to taste them. Sam got up from his bed and knocked on Dean's door. "Dean? Jacob and I are hungry we were wondering if you could make your famous hamburgers?" he asked. Dean smiled he was glad that Sam always had loved his hamburgers. But deep down he couldn't tell him how he made them. Dean opened his door, saw Sam by his door, and told Sam to meet him in the kitchen. Sam smiled and nodded. He ran back into his room and told Jacob.

Dean walked into the kitchen and saw Sam and Jacob talking while sitting at the table, they were talking about school. Dean smiled as he started to cook the hamburgers. "What do you want on your hamburgers Jacob?" he asked. "Cheese and ketchup please." Jacob said as he smiled and went back talking to Sam. Dean put a plate in front of Jacob and Sam. "Here you guys go, eat up and enjoy." Of course Sam knew that Dean always knew what he loved on his hamburgers. Dean went back into his room, resumed the song "Hey Jude", and sat on his bed again as he read the car magazine. He flipped through the pages as he hummed to the song quietly.

Sam laughed as Jacob and him were talking about what happen in the show they were watching a little while ago, as Sam heard the front door slam. Sam jumped and looked at Jacob. This wasn't good his dad was back and Jacob was here. He didn't know how to explain it to his dad who Jacob was yet. He grabbed Jacob's hand and quickly ran into his room. Sam couldn't stop shaking, cause he didn't know how he gonna explain Jacob to his dad without him knowing they were dating. He was too afraid to tell his dad in the first place. He knew he was raised not to date another man. Man should always be married to a woman, Sam was told over and over. No matter how many times him and Dean were forced to learn it. It made Sam sick that he hated how their dad had to preach it to them. He wanted to be different and happy with who he was, even if it had to be a with another guy. He quickly looked at Jacob and said, "I will protect you I promise." he said quietly. John went into Dean's room first and turned off his music. "Where's Sam?" he slurred. "Last time I checked he was in the kitchen eating his hamburger I made him." Dean said as he didn't remove his face from the magazine. Dean could tell that their dad been drinking pretty heavily today. This wasn't great especially since Sam had his boyfriend over. He had to find a way to distract their dad so Sam could find a way to get Jacob out of the house. John went out of Dean's room and went into the kitchen. He looked around he could see there was two plates sat there. Someone else was in his house besides Dean and Sam. This made John even more angry. So then he went into Sam's room and opened his door.

There in his room he could see Sam shaking with another guy behind him. "Who's this other guy behind you Sam?" John slurred again. Sam was too shaken up to speak, seeing his dad drunk, he couldn't say anything. John got closer and asked again. "Who's this other guy behind you Sam?" but he said it louder so that Dean could hear. Sam still didn't say anything, so then John grabbed Sam and threw him against the wall. "Boy, don't you got any manners when I am talking to you?" Jacob flinched as he saw Sam got thrown against the wall. He had never seen a grown man behave like this before. He didn't know if he should call the cops or run and protect Sam himself? Or go and get Dean. He couldn't move. "Now answer me son, who is this other guy in my house?!" John spat at Sam. "T-that's my boyfriend sir." Sam said quietly as he stuttered, he couldn't lie to his dad. "How many times do I have to tell you and Dean? Do I need to tell you again in front of him?" John was now yelling at Sam. With that Dean was ready to go into Sam's room and help Sam out. But Dean knew that he couldn't especially when their dad was stronger, than him when he was drunk. "No sir, please don't. Just let it go I promise I won't bring him here ever again and I will break up with him. Just don't hurt him." Sam said as he was trying not to cry. He knew that it was a sign of weakness to his dad. "You better do it right here and right now then Sam." John said as dropped Sam. Sam got up and looked down as he walked over to Jacob. "I am so so sorry Jacob, I don't really wanna do this, but I have to respect my dad's wishes, and you gotta go and we can't continue seeing each other." he said. Jacob's eyes widened as he couldn't believe his ears. Did Sam just break up with him? This was all a dream. "Go on now Jacob, go before my dad does something." Sam said quietly. Jacob couldn't move he wanted to hold onto Sam, to make sure he was gonna be okay. But he had to respect the wishes that Mr. Winchester gave to Sam. So he left.

Sam looked down as he rubbed his nose on his sleeve. That was the hardest thing he ever did his lifetime . "Are you crying Sam, what did I tell you about crying in my house?" his dad asked. "No sir I am not crying." He said, as he still tried holding the tears back. "Good." John said as he pushed him onto the floor. "Now if I ever see Jacob again you gonna rejected boy." He said as he kicked him few times, before he left the room. Sam curled up, as he quietly cried himself to sleep on his floor.

End of Flashback

Dean shivered as the memory sneak back into his head. How could he ever explain that to Castiel? Especially when he couldn't do anything to protect his brother Sam. "Hello Dean, are you there?" Castiel asked as he waved his hand in front of Dean a few more times, like he had been doing earlier while Dean was not all there. Dean shook his head and looked at Castiel, "Oh, sorry Cas, what were you saying?" Dean asked. "I asked, why are we keeping this relationship a secret from Sam?" asked Castiel again. Dean still couldn't explain it to him. What if he told Castiel, and Castiel told Sam? Sam would probably be just like dad, telling him how wrong it was, because of how much Sam went through, when it happened with him and Jacob. He remembered everything when he was growing up. those first 9 years of his life how John used to treat him and Sam. Lucky enough that him and Sam were able to get out that traumatic life, before it took their lives with their dad. In a way, Dean was happy that their dad wasn't around anymore in fact he was dead. Dean remembered it like it was yesterday, but he couldn't tell Sam the truth until he was able to understand it. It took Dean at least a couple years to man up. and tell Sam the truth why their dad was never coming back. So Dean took a deep breath and told Castiel the truth about what had happened.

Sam went to sit down on Gabriel's couch, as he waited for Gabriel to come back into the living room. Gabriel was going through all his clothes, he knew he couldn't wear the same clothes he wore almost everyday. Now that it was getting noticeable, that he was wearing the same clothes every day when he left the house. When Sam wasn't around, people would stop, stare, and whisper to each other. Luckily enough he had some other clothes, hidden somewhere in his room. Today was the day that he had to find a way to tell Sam the truth, about what was really going on with him. Or maybe he could wait until Saturday, when it was nicer outside that he could take him to the Summer House. Where he would go away during the Summer, that was next to the beach. It was romantic there, maybe it was a better place to tell Sam the truth there. And maybe... He shook his head, as he put on some clothes. He stepped out of his room and smiled.

"Hey Samsquash, sorry it took a while. Miss me?" Gabriel said, as he still had a smile on his face. Sam looked up and his eyes widened, this was the first time in a long time that he saw Gabriel in different clothes. "Gabe, what did you do? Did you get lost in your wardrobe?" He said, as he laughed. "No, I thought it was time for a change. You don't like it?" Gabriel looked at Sam then back down at his clothes. He thought he looked alright. Why didn't Sam like it? Sam stood up and laughed again, "Here let me help you there." Sam said, as he walked by Gabriel. "What's wrong with my outfit?" Gabriel asked. "Nothing is wrong with it, just how you put it on, Gabe. Its totally not even." Sam said, as he fixed up Gabriel's shirt and tie.

Then all the sudden a tiny kitten, that was black and orange with blue eyes ran into living room, and mewed a few times at Gabriel. Sam jumped as he heard the random mews. Then he looked down, and saw this little tiny kitten rubbing against his and Gabriel's leg. "When did you get a kitten?" Sam asked. "Oh, you are talking about little Cassie. I got him a few weeks ago, when one of my coworker's cat had kittens. Isn't little Cassie cute?" Gabriel said, as he picked up Cassie. Sam gave him this unexpected look. "What? It gets lonely around here without you, Samsquash." Gabriel said. "No. Why did you name him Cassie? Isn't that short for Castiel?" Sam asked. "Yeah and? I am not allow to name him after Castiel, my little brother?" Gabriel asked. Sam rolled his eyes. "Well maybe we could of named him together next time." said Sam, as he tried to reach out and pet Cassie. Cassie mewed and purred as he saw Sam's hand, trying to paw at it with his little paw. It looked like he wanted Sam to pet him. Gabriel chuckled, "It looks like little Cassie already approves of you there, Samsquash." Sam grinned as he petted little Cassie.

Dean looked at Castiel as he waited for to hear what Castiel had to say about what he told him. Castiel sat there in silence for a while. How could anyone like Dean and Sam go through something like that? That wasn't right of John. He didn't know who John was, only thing he knew was that John was their dad. But he was glad that Dean and Sam didn't have to put up with that anymore. "Cas, you ok man? What I said, did it upset you?" Dean asked as he watch Castiel tilt his head, as if he was trying to figure out what to tell Dean, especially how confusing their lives were before they met him. "Yeah, but why would a man like him, do that to you and Sam you guys didn't deserve that Dean?" Castiel said. "I know Cas, that's why I am glad our father is dead. He deserves what he got." Dean said as he grinned. Maybe it was wrong saying that, but it was true.

Flashback

Dean and Sam were sitting at the table, preparing an early dinner for their dad since it was Christmas day. They were hoping that their dad wasn't going to come home drunk, like last Christmas. This time of the year, was the worse time for John, because Mary was dead. The boys work harder every year, just to make their dad happy. Even if it meant, that they did not get any Christmas gifts from their dad. Only gifts they ever got were beatings and preaching about God. It was the worse gift they had. "Dean, when is dad coming back? I don't really want to be around, when he is drunk again." Sam said. He was only 14 years old. It was already hard on him, that he still wasn't to see Jacob anymore. Especially now that John made sure they didn't see each other in school. This was gonna be the first year, that Jacob and him were going to exchange Christmas gifts. Well now he couldn't cause John made them break up. "I hope he will be here soon, Sammy. I will make sure dad doesn't hurt you." said Dean, he was 18 years old. It was bad enough that he couldn't protect him from their dad, when their dad made him break up with Jacob. It was already hurting him deep down. Dean was finishing the last touches on the ham. It wasn't the easiest thing that Dean could cook, but he tried his best on the foods he made, even though he'd rather cook Sam and him hamburgers. But this wasn't just for Sam and him, he had to make sure their dad had dinner too.

An hour later, after Dean pulled out the ham he heard the front door slam. John was home from wherever he usually goes. Sometimes he goes from bar to bar, just to get blasted. Dean didn't like him being drunk, especially with how violent he got when he was. He could hear their dad entering in the kitchen and glared at Sam and Dean. Dean could automatically smell the alcohol on him. Yep, he was drunk. Dean sighed as he said, "Sam and I made you a Christmas dinner, we hope you like it sir." Sam gripped onto Dean's t-shirt tightly. "What's you made boy?" John slurred. "We made ham, with potatoes and green beans, sir. Like how mom used to every Christmas." "Don't you dare speak about her in this house, boy." John yelled at Dean, as Sam gripped onto Dean's t-shirt even tighter. "Sorry sir, we made your plate first, before us." Dean said. John grabbed the plate and walked into the living room. Sam looked up at Dean. "Dean, this is going to be long night again, isn't it?" he asked quietly. Dean nodded, but made sure that their dad didn't see or hear what they were talking about.

John finish his plate and yelled "Boys, get your asses in here now." as he was sitting in the recliner. Dean and Sam walked out from the kitchen and stood by their dad. "Yes sir?" asked Dean and Sam at the same time. "Who did the most of the cooking on tonight's dinner?" John asked. "I did, sir. Sam just watched me cook it, since you told him he couldn't cook anything with the stove, sir." Dean said. John threw the plate on the ground. "Well make sure next time you cook it; cook it a little longer, it wasn't cooked all the way through." John said as he stood up. "I am going out to get more beer, you better cook me something else when I get back." Dean looked down and saw the plate shattered into tiny pieces on the ground. John took his coat and stepped outside, as he slammed the door behind him. "Dad is really angry, isn't he?" Sam asked, as he heard the impala starting up. "Yeah, he is, but he shouldn't be driving, especially if he's intoxicated. He should have let me go grab that beer for him." Dean said.

Dean and Sam stood by the front window, as they waited hours for their dad to come home. He hasn't been back yet. Sam was still gripping onto Dean's T shirt. "Where's dad, why hasn't he returned yet?" he asked. Dean shrugged, far as he cared he didn't want their dad to be back. "I don't know Sam. I honestly don't know."

A few minutes later, the house phone rang and Sam and Dean looked at each other. John told them to never answer the house phone. But it could be their dad saying he is locked up for being pulled over, and they needed to come and bail him out. "Dean, you should answer that since your the oldest. Dad would be furious if I answered it." Sam said as he took his hand of from Dean's T shirt. Dean walked to the phone and said "Hello?" "Hello is this Dean or Sam Winchester?" said the female voice. "This is Dean Winchester, who is this?" "This is the Lawrence Memorial Hospital. I have got your dad, John Winchester, here. He was rushed here. We need to talk in person. If you can find a way here Dean?" said the female voice. Dean swallowed hard, as he heard that his dad was in the hospital. 'What happened now? Is his dad ok? Is he dead? Is he hurt?' he asked himself. "Alright, I will be there as soon as I can." he said, as he hung up the phone. "Who was that Dean?" asked Sam, as he looked scared. Dean couldn't tell him. "Sam, you have to wait here. I promise I will be right back. I will tell you everything when I return." Dean said, as he went to grab his coat from his room. Sam nodded and went into his room.

Few hours later, Dean looked around to see if he could find the nurse who called him, and look for his dad. He found the front desk and said "I am Dean Winchester, someone called me earlier about my dad?" "Yes, let me page the nurse who called, you give me a minute." said the receptionist lady. Dean tapped the counter with his fingers, as he waited not being patience. "Dean, she will be here in a few minutes, please go ahead and sit down." said the receptionist lady. Dean nodded, as he went to sit down. Hospitals weren't Dean's favorite place to be at. Especially waiting around to know what happen to their dad.

"Dean Winchester?" asked a female. He looked up, "That's me." he said. "Hi, my name is Karen. I was the one who called you. About John Winchester." said Karen. "Yes, I am his son, well one of them. The oldest. Sam, he's at home, I didn't want him to come just in case something really bad happened." Dean said. "If you come this way, I will talk to you about what's going on." Karen said, as she showed him to a private room. He nodded, as he followed her.

They got into a private room, as she closed the door behind him. "Well, what's going on? Is he ok? Is he hurt?" Dean couldn't sit down, he just wanted to know what he was looking at. "I am sorry, sir. But John, your dad, is dead. He was in an accident. They try everything to revive him, when they found him. But he was barely breathing, when someone called 911." Dean's eyes widened. Did he heard her correctly? John was dead. How? Karen grabbed a chair and said, "Here, before you faint." Dean sat in it. He didn't know where to start. "Are you sure he's dead?" Dean asked, as he tried not to be too alarmed or scared. "Yes sir, he is." Dean took a big relieved sigh. In a way, he was happy he didn't have to deal with anymore beatings or preaching about God from his dad. But now how was he gonna tell Sammy. "Thank you Karen, may I see him before I leave?" asked Dean.

End Flashback


End file.
